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I feel human again! Since I last talked to you I:
-Went to the oto, got antibiotics for yet another infection (definitely going for second opinion April 1).
-Actually started using my inhaler thing that's supposed to help me with the cough that is from the sinus drainage.
-Made appointment with ob/gyn for annual exam/hormone discussion/endometrial ablation discussion. Appointment is March 7, not bad.
-Really cleaned my house.
-Played with Bubba.
-Did laundry.
-Had Girl's Night with LilCherie and karmagirl (So fun! Thanks for hosting me, ladies!)
-Sent my husband flowers and jelly beans. I know, you are probably thinking "What the fuck are you doing???" Well....he was depressed last week too, and I felt sorry for him, and I wanted to cheer him up. He appreciated it. It was a nice thing to do. What can I say? I'm a pushover.
-Arranged for my sister to take Bubba next weekend, weather permitting.
-Had a pleasant discussion with my mother. She revealed that in her research on depression (i.e., reading the book I mentioned earlier), she has begun recognizing some of the same stuff in herself and especially in her mother! This is a huge breakthrough in my mother's Great Wall of Denial. I hope it will help her and me.

Aurelia commented on one of my earlier posts that I need to get on the pill. I really think that suggestion has a lot of validity, and I will discuss it with my ob. I took it for a long time when I was younger and didn't have any problems with it...but now only I'm 37 and I smoke. And I know myself well enough to know that I am not going to quit smoking anytime soon, just ain't gonna happen. But I'll ask the doctor about risks/options. I mean, I guess I need to figure out if it's more likely that I'll have a stroke while on the pill, or kill myself/ruin my life from the depression I suffer when not on it? I'm also curious as to whether there's something else screwy going on that's fucking up my hormones that maybe could be fixed to solve the problem. We'll see. But it's pretty amazing how by period day three I'm 80 percent better than the day/week/two weeks before.

I have other stuff I want to blog about but I'm hungry and my pizza is done so, you know, I have my priorities. And I probably should get to the store because tomorrow we are supposed to get ice pellets, then freezing rain, then rain, then 4 to 8 inches of snow. On top of the four feet of snow and ice that we already have. At least it's over freezing today so some of it is melting before we get dumped on again. I can't complain enough about how much this winter has sucked....but right now it's sunny and warm and it's nice to smoke on the porch. What more could I want? (ha ha).